Loneliness and Belonging

Feels Like Home

Feeling at home is one of the most comforting experiences in life. Whether it be coming home to the smell of banana bread in the oven, hearing the voice of your mother over the phone, or sitting in your favorite chair reading a well-loved book, feeling at home is a somewhat serene experience that brings much comfort and rest. It echoes our eternal rest and belonging in Christ. These are the feelings that make us feel safe and at peace. The yearning for home will never truly be fulfilled in this life due to the broken and sinful world we live in. The world is filled with hurtful people who cause division, cliques, and unwelcoming environments. These are the blistering effects of sin that cause outsiders to feel unwelcome. This is why we must take every chance we get to welcome others with extraordinary hospitality. The Christian life should be marked by the hospitality and the love we show to others to make them feel welcomed and at home.

The Problem is Sin

Sin can surface when new people arrive in well-established places. This can cause new people to deal with unwelcoming environments and awful cliques. The sin of inhospitable people closes off any open opportunities for newcomers to thrive. Whether it be not acknowledging outsiders when they walk through the doors or not inviting them into your group. This lacks being open and loving to all people. The places you’d expect to be the most welcomed are the exact places where you feel it is easy to be overlooked. Every stage of life can bring new situations where one might struggle feeling like they belong. Struggles can arise in a new job, new school, new neighborhood, or even sometimes a new church. The feeling of not being welcomed is a sickening feeling and somewhat depressing. Everyone has felt this in some way throughout their lives. The way to respond to newcomers is crucial to making others feel at home.

We are called to reflect Christ in all that we are. It is easy to be caught up in our lives and in our personal circles that we don’t allow space for new people in our lives. This is a sinful reaction. Bearing God’s image includes obeying the simple biblical commands of kindness, hospitality, and loving our neighbor.

The greatest commandment in the Bible was spoken by Christ himself in Matthew 22:37-39, “’You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself.” Jesus just makes it so clear; he calls us to love our neighbor. But read this verse closely and notice the end, “as yourself.” It’s a true desire in all of us to be known and to feel like we belong, so welcome others as you would want to be welcomed. Ponder all the intricate ways Jesus loves us and apply that tangibly by extending love to everyone who walks through any door. Let’s not fail at this commandment, but instead show people we are Christians by our love.

Jesus Welcomed Everyone

So, how can we do this? First, Jesus exemplified this better than any of us ever could, so peering into the precious pages of his word and looking at his perfect life is the only true example we have. People went to great lengths just to have a chance to catch a glimpse of Jesus. Remember Zacchaeus (Luke 19:1-10), who climbed a sycamore tree? Even he was welcomed by Jesus. Consider the woman who touched Jesus’ robe for healing (Matthew 9:20-22). Both characters in the Bible were risky and bold. Jesus responds in the most kind and welcoming way. He was not in a hurry, inconvenienced, or annoyed, but stopped and welcomed them both with love.

Matthew 8:1-4 shows Christ’s response to the unwelcome. The poor leper man who was an outcast was healed by the welcoming touch of Jesus. Jesus was surrounded by great crowds of followers, yet he welcomed the leper when the leper fell at his feet begging for healing. Jesus loved the leper and set him free from his illness.

Jesus was not consumed by the great crowd of followers; he did not think for a moment, “What would they think if I touch this diseased man?” Or will I lose followers from healing this man? Jesus instinctively decided to heal the man, and it was not due to Jesus’ status or following. It was because Jesus sincerely loved the man. Jesus focused on the man and welcomed him with love.

Wherever you find yourself, you may soon be the new person desiring to belong. Go out of your way like Jesus did to welcome the newcomers or people on the outskirts. Welcome others the way you want to be welcomed. Don’t be too caught up in your own friend circles or the busyness of life to notice the people God places in your life. Welcome others like your life depends on it.

Why? Because it is doing what the Lord instructed us to do and truly bearing his image. Welcoming someone who may be new, lonely, or just someone you notice to be on the outskirts could be a significant factor for that person who needs to follow Christ. Maybe it was the warm and welcoming hello or the invite to coffee afterwards that made someone feel welcomed. Being welcoming can and will change the world around us because it has ripple effects of the love of Jesus.

Finally Home

It takes time for people to find fellowship and to feel at home in a new place. Whether starting a new job, attending a new church, or moving to a new neighborhood, finding fellowship takes time. Remind yourself that you once were the new one, so welcome others with open arms. Be hospitable and inviting to them.

Welcome the newcomers and bring them into the fold wherever you are. Make them feel that whatever place you’re in is the best place in the world. When someone new walks through the doors into your life, welcome them with eagerness and excitement. Introduce yourself to them, get to know them, remember their name, make them laugh, make them feel at home. We are called to love everyone, so don’t let cliques or closed-off friend groups get in the way. Count it as a blessing that someone new walks through the doors and is eager to find their place in your life. Welcome them so that they will feel at home.